this fire is burning

It’s so crazy to me that, in one month’s time, I will be back stateside. Today, I had a last meeting with my coach before I see her in NYC in about two months.

I trained a little, worked on my monologue, and learned some things about myself.

A listing of her comments, just so that I can store them away: a fine actor, especially good for film. very fresh, would be able to deliver in very few takes but might have trouble keeping it fresh with many takes. needs voice work. has an ethereal quality, reminds her of a young meryl streep. much potential. solid base but must work on technique. obvious for ophelia. extremely truthful.

The one thing that really stood out to me is that I need to work on my voice. And just my luck, my school will be offering a voice class this fall. So I can either try to get into this class or hire a coach, which could be costly.

This means that in the two months before I see her again, I need to have chosen three additional monologues (contemporary comedic, classical comedic, classical dramatic). This requires that I read A LOT of plays. I also would like to read some books on acting technique while I wait. I want to have my total of four monologues chosen before classes start up in the fall.

In addition, I will audition for two acting classes, a bunch of plays, and perhaps some student films. I will get my head shots done and submit to casting directors, agents, and managers in the New England area. I will interview for the voice class. I might enter into the lottery for another acting class. Hopefully, something will stick and reaffirm this conviction of mine.

I stepped out of the underground public transportation system yesterday to go to my internship, to find a movie filmed right there. Magic.

I am Sooze, finally

I did a lot of reading while on a weekend trip to a steamy southern location and came across a monologue a former acting teacher had always wanted me to do. It’s Sooze’s monologue from Eric Bogosian’s SubUrbia.

Something about the monologue had always turned me off. I think it’s because Sooze speaks in detail about the death of her brother who had Downs Syndrome. It made me feel uneasy. But upon rereading the play, rediscovering the monologue… it just felt right. Immediately, I knew that I had to switch my audition monologue to this one. I had been waiting for a monologue to click with me, and finally something did.

I discussed my former fear of this monologue with my coach. She said that recently a student of hers had performed it for a class. The student had cut out the beginning, where Sooze explains that her brother had Downs Syndrome. I guess it made her feel uncomfortable too. But we agreed that those beginning lines are important to the story and to the character. I’m glad that I’ve reached a point where I’m no longer afraid of this monologue. It’s beautiful. It’s poignant. And I really feel for Sooze throughout the entire play.

I don’t know if I’m speaking too soon, but I had some sort of a breakthrough with my coach a few days ago. I did a relaxation exercise, a breathing exercise using my monologue, and some associations. Although I was at first somewhat skeptical, the work really helped in the end. My coach was very happy with my work. I was very happy. We laughed. I cried. It was good.

There rest still a few concerns. I don’t think there’s enough of an arc in the monologue. I think it’s too monotone, if that makes sense. My coach said that I deliver it in a way that is very real, so the audience would go anywhere with me. But I don’t fully agree.

I have my work cut out for me.
I’m also waiting for another shipment of plays and another acting book. I want to find my contemporary comedic monologue as soon as possible. Then, onto the classics!

I’m already bracing myself for my university’s drama course and play auditions in the fall. I can do this!

Dust off Those Cobwebs!

I had my first private coaching session today. It was okay. I’m a little dismayed at how out of practice I am. I guess acting really is like a muscle sometimes.

We didn’t do very much during the one-hour session. She told me to bring in various plays where I had found interesting monologues. I did three cold readings, and she said that the last monologue (Catherine’s) in Tennessee Williams’ “Suddenly Last Summer” fit me the best. She seemed very excited about it.

I do feel a connection with Catherine and did enjoy the play, but I am hesitant to audition with a Tennessee Williams monologue. I was hoping to find something more recent, more fresh, and less likely to have been seen many times over. While “Suddenly Last Summer” is not one of Williams’ best known plays, he is still a prolific playwright. So I’m afraid that this monologue may be considered one of those “overdone” monologues that auditioners have seen hundreds, maybe even thousands, of times and of which they have grown tired. My coach was deciding between using this one or the monologue in the middle of the play where Catherine talks about the Mardi Gras ball. We both agreed that one was too safe. So hopefully this other monologue, from the very end of the play, will bode well for me.

Soon, I’m going to order a batch of new plays (ugh, it is so annoying not having any access to an English language library). This time, I will be searching for a comedic monologue. It seems that finding a comedic monologue is a difficult task, because so many of the female monologues I’ve found or pieced together are dramatic. I’m open to any suggestions and am wondering where to find a quality comedic monologue for a female (roughly) between the ages of 16 and 25. I am also going to keep an eye out for more dramatic monologues (due to my reservations with the Catherine monologue) but am limited by my small budget.

I have some reservations about my coach, but I can’t place my finger on why precisely. I think I’ll see how our second meeting devolves. Today, we did cold readings, a few exercises, etc. She gave me homework. I have to do a bunch of character analysis before our next session and want to finish reading A Dream of Passion by Lee Strasberg.

My Larry Shue monologue has been my go-to piece for so long now that it feels weird working on something else. A part of me wants to use it. Another part of me finds it way too stale. If I can get a better handle of it and freshen it up, then I might show it to her. I really should re-read the play.

I want to do good work. And I want to get into this one particular acting class at school that you have to audition for. Getting into these drama classes can be a feat, especially since the teachers tend to choose students they’ve worked with or taught in the past. I know that I need training at this point, and I am really hoping that I can come up with at least one good contemporary monologue so that I can get into that class. If I can do that, then preparing three additional monologues for an MFA or conservatory program should be no problem.

So let’s do this.

I need to get rid of this rust.